Allison, Don and Noah discuss mixed feelings over the court’s decision to allow the parents of a dead naval officer to use his sperm and a surrogate to create a kid whom they will raise as their own child, though he would be their biological grandchild.
I listened to your podcast about the parents seeking to have achild from their dead so’s harvested sperm. I am surprised that non of you discussed this situation form a psychological standpoint. As you told it, the mother on being informed of he death of son seemed to me to try to shield herself from the tragic news. Instead ofgrieving she immediately wants to bring him back to life via his sperm. This seems to me a response of someone who wants to shield herself form unbearable pain and so and can’t face mourning her dead son. The energy she is using fight to get his sperm is perhaps a defense against experiencing her loss. She was almost certainly a wonderful mother to her son but she is 20 years older and has just experienced a terrible trauma. She wants her son’s child but his child is an original new life that cannot replace her son or make up for his death.How will she cope with a child who looks like his surrogate and nothing like her son? Or a child who looks like her son but has a totally very different personality? Her reactions to a child that doesn’t fulfill her fantasies could blight a new child’s future. I think you should have considered in discussion the mothers emotional well being and her need for support at the time of her her terrible loss rather than engage in discussion about the legalities.